b0yishChick

And I blog

2008-08-26T18:29:00.005+08:00

So ok, Bora wasn't that much helpful. I splurged, I bathe, I drank, I read, I ate, but I hadn't had that much time to think. So I splurged some more (more on that later).

okaeee..

work - check
friends - check
health - errr... check
love life - I love myself so check
finances - loans everywhere, but I'm coping.. so check

so what teh F is wrong?

Plans, that's what I need. I need plans. Well, I have plans naman.. spur of the moment plans. Ehehehe. Pero srsly, I DO have long term plans.. but most of them are at the bottom of my priority list. I want to do what I can do right now. Because I know at the age of 40, I won't be able to do whatever I wanted to do today. Like go for a drink, grab my clothes and head for wherever, meet new friends, dance, sing, etc.

*sigh* So what a girl to do? Make the biggest purchase of her LIFE! (which is really not connected to the paragraph above)

Yes, I bought something in Bora that could change my life forever! (After almost not boarding the plane and losing my rubber ducky with my DSLR and my friends' digicam) And would make me forever in debt (well 3 years naman). It could turn out bad or good, but I guess it's a risk I ~~was~~ am willing to take. PERO SYEMPRE SANA GOOD! FTW GOOD! YUNG TIPONG SUPER SULIT GOOD!

Anyhoo, can't say much details, pero if di maganda service nila, BE SURE NA LAGOT SILA SA BLOG KO! nyahahahha! (nananakot lang :)).

So ayun, like I said, sana yan yung suwerteng kapalit ng mga ~~kamalasan~~ katangahan ko nung asa Bora ako.

+++

Edward Cullen is the first fictional character that I fell in love with (well, besides Batman). I don't know why, must be the way he speaks, the words he choses, the way I imagine him smile... It helps that he is a vampire. The more fictional he is the more I love his character. I mean, I know that I would never ever meet someone like him so reading Twilight doesn't give me false hopes of having guy like Edward.

Annnnd made me realize that it takes a 17 year old guy, 80 years to mature.. nyeheheheh..

+++

The ex has a new girlfie.. uhuh uhuh :D well I'm glad he told me (although I had a hunch) and I'm happy for him. Sana lang mag mature na sya sa relationship na 'to at maging stable. Sana ren matulungan sya na ayusin ang buhay niya in general. Anyway, him having a new relationship made me realize that a slight part of my depression the past few weeks is the guilt of leaving him in pain (as what he says). Now that I see him smiling and I can joke around him, it made me feel much better and relieved. Sana mag tuloy-tuloy para sa kanya :D

+++

FTW!!!! I HAS TICKETS TO THE E-HEADS REUNION CONERT!!!! YEBAH!!

%%masdan mo aking mata.. di mo ba nakikita.. ako ngayo'y lumilipad at nasa langit na.. gusto mo bang.. sumama%%

Emo-ness

2008-08-12T13:49:00.005+08:00

It's been what? More than a month? *le sigh* Not much has happened the past month. Well, more drinking and more hanging out with friends. Training is over so I get to do real job (which made me really glad). Went to galera with QC friends, our first outing ever! Have tons of bills to pay. Finally getting enough sleep since my work starts at 9 AM. Beauty pill texts once in a while and somehow it makes me red, (flattered and furious). Have no idea what's happening with the ex, and I feel that's what he wants. Also been texting with JC (who's the first ex), about depression, life, past, future, etc... which really makes me feel glad that we're still friends. Yanyan is getting married and I'm happy for him and somehow sad for our friendship since we haven't got together in a while. Still looking for a kaladkarin friend. Tin and Keren is also getting married next year so I have to lose weight. Harold came back to PI to visit last month and Leah will be back in September.

And yes, nothing much has happened. I've been depressed most of the time and hanging out with friends seems to be the right cure. Which makes me glad that I have a number of acquaintances and friends. Though you can't help being alone sometimes. Which is actually healthy because you get to think about stuffs. But when these things are those that you usually don't understand, it gets tough. *"Tough times". Sometimes I hate myself for thinking to much or sometimes too late. Sometimes I really don't know what's bothering me. I find it hard to open up nowadays unlike before, which I think is the problem. But how can you open up if you don't even know what's bothering you right?

Don't get me wrong, alone is not bad. I enjoy being alone sometimes.

I want my own sanctuary, a hiding spot. Some place I could go and think. Some place green and windy or a beach, easy access yet only a few people knows the place. Some place I could cry and laugh alone. Where I could lie down and stare at the sky until the stars come out. Where I could talk to space without wondering if anyone is hearing me. I know I sound crazy, but you get what I mean.

I'll be going to Bora this weekend with a few girlfriends. I know it's like a party place, but hopefully I'll be able to do a few thinking there.. and have fun of course. At least now I know what I want to happen in Bora.

*tough love, thanks to my girlfriends for the "gift" :)

Finally

2008-06-21T22:48:00.003+08:00

I've been in my new project for about 3 weeks now. I'm still undergoing training so I'm not that busy. I'm enjoying it, since my idle time is spent online. I get to chat with old friends again and blog-hop and plurk and twit and mobwars... ehehhehe...

It took six months for me to get re-assigned. I remember requesting a re-assignment late last year. I told myself if I don't get re-assigned by the time I'm 25 (which is 3 months from now), it's time for me to move on... to another company. Which is really hard for me because I love the people here :(.

Then came the offer for the new project. It was hard to resist. (1) Because it's something new (Slightly web dev.. beats mainframe anytime), (2) New working hours!!! Yay!!!, and yes.. internet access.

So I said yes, and here I am.. blogging during lunch time. After how many days I've been here, I've been able to blog only now. Hehehe.

I miss my old project though. I miss the bonding I have with my team mates. I miss knowing most of the people you meet in the hallway.. But heck, you have to move on to learn new things, or is it you have to learn new things before you can move on? Either way, I'm learning new things and I'm trying to move on. This is for my career naman diba? Sana lang things would get much more better from here.

+++

Buti na lang andito si juliebee (One of my first friends at work) kaya medyo hindi mahirap para sa ken. Haha!

+++

A couple of nights ago, after drinking coffee late at night and I can't sleep, I edited one of my pictures to see how would I look with colored contacts.. teehee

Although the gray looks a bit brown.. ehehehe.. I likey all! ahahahah pero syempre di ko naman talaga kaya mag colored contacts. Di kaya ng confidence level ko.. ahahhaha.. Shy ako eh.. ehehhehehe

+++

Well I have a lot of things to post about pero outline ko na lang.. ahahahahah
+ Went to shelley's place last weekend for some drinks and pasta and wii!!!!
+ Playing badminton for an upper class is really challenging. Nabubugbog ako eh.. eheheheh
+ Bora this august!! wooohooo!! sana hindi bumagyo
+ Beauty Pill strikes again!!! and then backs out... para syang extra joss, temporary high lang.. eheheheh
+ So happy that I was able to chat with Yan-yan again.. but I can feel that we're not how close we used to be..
+ College girlfriends are settling down.. where does that left me? Wild and free and bridesmaid to be.. Hahaha!
+ I hope he grows up.
+ I hate my brother for introducing mobwars to me.. pfft!
+ Finished HIMYM season 3!!! Weeeh!! mi ♥ barney!!!
+ I wanna watch PATD, Lifehouse, Foo Fighters (is it true?), Alicia Keys.. kainez naman ang raming concerts!
+ I love my brothers.. wala lang.. gusto ko lang sabihin.. ehehehhe

... marami pa eh.. pero inaalala ko pa.. so good luck na lang sa ken.. And tapo sna ren lunch break.. yosi break muna.. eheheh..

I wish I could blog more. *le sigh* ang raming beses ko na sinabi yun. Ehehehehe..

xoxo

Abigol

Untitled

2008-06-14T13:26:00.004+08:00

I realized that maybe I'm not suited for a committed relationship. I have lots of friends, I'm impulsive, I have tons of things to do, I want to go to many places, I have to get back into sports, I want to do things myt own way, etc. I'm turning 25 and I haven't really accomplished anything yet. Wala pa nga akong license at passport eh.

I have time for myself now. I can have my quality time with myself. Like going to the mall, eating out, having coffee.. all-by-myself. I can't do that before without someone bombarding me with text messages like "Ano gawa mo?", "Anong oras ka uwi?", "Di ka pa ba tapos?" like I'm some kid coming home to my mom.

I do miss him. Or maybe I miss having someone take care of me. But then, why let someone else take care of you if you can take care of yourself? And by his actions this past few weeks, it made me realized that I did the right thing for myself. Selfish no? Ilang months ren naman ako naging selfless no.

I do want someone in the future though. Someone who can stand on his own too. Someone I can connect to. Someone that would be the man of the house. But not right now. I'm not looking naman for someone eh.

Kaya ngayon eto.. besides work, nag frisbee training ako yesterday, tas may badminton tournament pa sa office, and sana matuloy yung basketball with the girls (si chenai sana magayos. ehhehehe).. and may mga planned out of trips pa ko, tapos medyo nawawala na ang social constraint ko. Ehehehehe.

BTW, go to Shelley's blog for a rundown on our baler adventure last May 1 to 4. Sobrang fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-05-23T13:14:00.001+08:00

"let the sun shine.. let the rivers run away.. coz it's beautiful day now to play now, as i close my eyes and pray.. Lord have mercy on me.. coz i'm feelin kinda lonely, could you be, would you be.. my one and only"

Usapang Bola

2008-05-15T16:19:00.000+08:00

I miss watching NBA or just being updated with it. Saya tuloy ng may internet para sa live scores. Ever since I worked, wala na talaga akong constant update sa NBA, kahit PBA.. UAAP lang kasi asaran sa office.

I really wish Boston wins. Garnett deserves it. Para naman magpahinga na sya. Ang tanda na niya eh. Hehehhe.

Sana ren matalo ng New Orleans ang Spurs. Sawa na ko sa kanila eh. Kelangan ng fresh blood. Malufet si CP3 eh. Di ko naman napanood lahat ng games nila, pero yung minsanan na panonood ko eh nakakatuwa sya. (At nakipagpustahan ako eh. Hehe)

I don't like Kobe and si Lebron naman, di ko ren masyado gusto. I mean their good, pero kung si MJ nga di ko gusto eh, sila pa!? (Nakipagpustahan ren ata ako na di mananalo Cavs sa finals.. tama ba Daron?

Di pumasok yung team ng gusto kong player so di ko na sya babanggitin. Next year sana.

Yun lang. Papalipas lang ng break.

10 minutes of blogging

2008-05-13T12:53:00.003+08:00

I am on training right now and it's currently our break so I have time to blog. I think.

So bear with me.

I've been officially single for about 3-4 days now, and it's quite surprising that I'm ok. Ok maybe I'm really not ok. But then, after a few heart breaks, scars, emotional breakdown and anything that makes me wish I'm dead, I realize that there are more people who has bigger problems than the matters of the heart. I have better things to do than breaking down, punching the wall, acting drunk or whatever.

I hate him (as a boyfriend). There, I said it. I care for him since he's one of those people that made me happy. But if you knew things that you didn't know before, wouldn't you ask yourself if it's still worth it? Is it still worth not regretting the trouble you went through just for him? That still puzzles me.

I've always thought that it was my fault. That it's the risk I took entering a relationship with a 20 year old. But then, how would you feel if he makes you feel guilty with everything you do? when he does things you never knew he could? Things that he usually feel bad about when you do it?

I'm just glad that we are in the same group of friends. It would help me not hate him more and probably in time be really good friends with him.

I will be better.

And I hope he will accept the fact that it's over and will be better too.

I did love him. But I love myself more.

10 minutes over.

A new old friend

2008-04-02T10:30:00.006+08:00

A few weeks back, I think it was black saturday, an old friend messaged me on friendster. Initial reaction? Gulat, tuwa at curious kung bakit bigla akong ni-pm at ni-add. Madyo nagkaron kasi kami ng misunderstanding before and di na kami nagusap ever since. More than 3 years kaming hindi naguusap. Pero time after time, naaalala ko sya and I realize how much I miss her.

She asked if I remember her, of course I remember her! I remember how fond we were of the moon, how she treats me at starbucks (estudyante pa ko nun at mocha frappe lang ang alam kong inumin), how we watch UAAP finals sa TV, how we went to glorietta to meet another friend, how we disagree on so many things but still enjoy hanging out with each other. I learned a lot from her. But I guess some story has to end. I guess we both need to grown on our own.

Anyways, The very same day, we exchanged new numbers and decided to meet each other at starbucks near our place. I didn't know what to expect. I was thinking maybe we are too much apart that we don't have anything to talk about anymore. Maybe it would be a little awkward.I mean, I haven't heard from her in years and haven't got any news from her. What would be my first words? What would I tell her? You know.. those things.

But it was surprisingly comfortable. Parang dati pa ren. Parang one week lang kami hindi nagkita. Sobrang kuwentuhan to the max. And new topics! Like Billups, T-Mac, Kobe, Conspiracy, Lozada, Nickleback, Blogging, etc. Nakakatuwa talaga sya. Six hours kaming nag chikahan. And after a long time, naka 3 bote ako ng beer, ng hindi nagiging tipsy. I guess ganun talaga pag di mo napapansin ang naiinom mo sa sobrang saya ng kuwentuhan. I'm glad to see her happy self again and much more contented. She's still the same but somehow changed.. labo ba? hehehehe.. She still stands for what she believes in. She's one of those few kasi na masasabi mong totoo sa sarili.

It's a start of an old friendship. Labo ba? Pero if you were in my place, I guess maiintindihan niyo. I'm looking forward to see her more and talk about stuffs again and to learn more from her. Sobrang happy :) Lalo na maisip mo na hindi lang pala patikim ang friendship niyo nun and matutuloy ren pala sya on its own time. Wala lang, nakakatuwa lang isipin :)

Chubby ka chubby

2008-03-08T18:52:00.003+08:00

Tinitignan ko ang mga larawan ko noon. Ang laki ng nilaki ko. Literal! Nakakalungkot isipin na nung panahon n ayun ay pakiramdam ko ang panget ko.. ang taba ko.. samantalang ngayon tunay na uhm.. huggable ako ay feeling ko ang ganda ko.. Sayang lang at sana nuon pa man, na suot ko na ang mga gusto kong suotin at nagawa ko na ang mga gusto kong gawin.

Noon:

Ngayon, nahihirapan na ko umakyat ng hagdan, mag high heels, at d na kasya ang mga pantalong ko dati. Madalas na ko ma winnie the pooh. Iba na kasi siguro ang activities ko ngayon. Mas gusto ko pa matulog. Haaaay... In a span of a year or two, ang laki ng binigat ko :(..

O diba? Pero syempre may matitinong pictures pa naman ako ngayon.. baka isipin niyo ganyan itsura ko in real life.. d naman masyado.. ehehehhee.. mas maganda ako ng in person.. tarush! ahahahahha

At least ngayon, mas feeling ko na maganda ako.. Ahahahah! Haba ng huuur ko ngayon eh. Howell, sana the sportsfest helps in me getting back into shape.

Iba siguro talaga nagagawa ng confidence. Dahil kahit lumaki ako, mas marami nag sasabi na umaayos ren naman itsura ko (wala naman nagsasabi na panget ako noon eh, mas marami lang nagsasabi na maganda ako ngayon). Yun na ren siguro ang effect sa ken ng pagiging optimistic.. sabi nga nila, you are what you think. Therefore I'm adobo!! este.. I'm beautiful (sorry.. gutom lang d pa nag didinner).

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But then, may moments na feeling ko ang panget ko talaga.. na naiinsecure ako sa ibang tao.. and i know this post won't help me. Everytime na makikita ko to, malulungkot ako lalo na pag i'm depressed.. na maaalala ko na may time sa life ko na pwede ko gawin ang mga gusto ko, pero di ko ginawa. Na iisipin ko ano ba nangyari sa ken bakit ako biglang namaga. Na wag ako mag maganda dahil di ako maganda.

I know, baka mababaw lang to sa ibang tao.. pero kung babae ka, you'd understand how I feel. Kahit ang mga payat at magaganda, ay may mga ganitong moments ren.

So mag iiwan ako ng note sa sarili ko (at sa ibang tao) next time na mabasa ko to:

Note to self: Mabuting tao ka. Alam mo sa sarili mo na mabuti ang kalooban mo at yun ang tunay na kagandahan. Ang mahalaga ay kung pano ka nabuhay, paano ka sa ibang tao.. paano ka sa sarili mo. Kung pano ka babangon pagkatapos ng bawat pagsubok. Di ka man blessed sa genes, blessed ka naman sa ibang bagay at dapat magpasalamat ka para dun. And ano man itsura mo, may nagmamahal sayo. Ang laki ng inimprove mo as a person, so don't stop now. Stay optimistic. See the glass as half-full.

aaaaand dahil sobrang serious na, at if nde mag work yung note sa taas, eto.. last note:.. ika nga ng isang beri gud friend ko.. balance of nature lang... d pwedeng maganda at matalino in one.. kaya matalino ka!!!.. ehhehehehe

*ni resize ko yung pics.. d ko sure kung tama.. wala kasi akong photoshop eh.. huhuhuhu

Love Month

2008-03-01T22:13:00.002+08:00

I am not a big fan of valentines. Baka defense mechanism lang. Pero this year was different. It was the first time I spent it with a special someone :). He picked me up at the office and we spent the evening together. Knowing him, I know it's really an effort. And I'm really glad he did it because it made me love him more ♥

+++

I also went home to the province last month. It was a BLAST! I mean, it was more than what I expected. You see, my brothers and I rarely get together. I think this is the first time that we all went together to the province, as in family lang namin. Walang aunts, walang cousins. Except for a close friend (Chesca was with us). Nakapag bond kami through DS, PSP, eating, smoking, drinking (with our Lolo who drinks red horse), etc. I'm happy na close kami ng mga kapatid ko. Bihira lang kasi ako makakita ng ganun eh. Eheheheh.

+++

Also went to Galera last weekend with my girlfriends! Ang saya kasi sunog kami lahat, ehehehhe. And nakapag relax kami. Sarap ren uminom ng beer ng hapon kahit mainit basta asa beach, mas masarap ren ngayon ang mindoro sling nila. Ehehehe. ANG HIRAP MAG UNDERWATER POSE!! eheheheh.. Sana talaga I have my own PC na para I could post my pictures.. haaaay...

+++

Sabi ko I'll try to update as much as possible, ang nangyayari puro recap lang.. huhuhu...

Finally!

2008-02-05T19:23:00.000+08:00

WAAH!! Ang tagal ko na inasam na mag blog.. ngunit ako'y nakalipat na at d pa kaya ng budget ang DSL at desktop PC. Kamusta naman kayong lahat? Sana may naka miss sa ken.. ahahhaha..

Anyhoo, Masarap ren pala ang tumira malayo sa pamilya. Nakakaranas ng mga bagay na d ko naranasan dati. Nagkakaron na ren ako ng pahanon para sa sarili ko. Suwerte ko n lang at may mabuti akong housemate at chariot driver kaya nakakatipid kahit papano. Kaya lang marami pa ren kelangan bayaran, sana pag nabayaran ko na sila, may pambili na ko ng sariling kotse or pang down sa isang townhouse. Mas maaga na ko nakakatulog ngayon at mas nakakapag concentrate sa trabaho (oo!! nag o-OT na ko!! ahahhaha). Mas gumaganda ang pakiramdam at d na madalas ang tamaditis na kasakitan ko. Ang saya diba?

Nakatulong ren ang paglayo sa aking love life. Dahil mas nag loo-look forward ako sa mga araw na makikita ko sya, at nagkakaron kami ng panahon para sa aming mga sarili. Mas malimit ang away at tampuhan, at nag go-grow ang aming relationship to a semi-mature level.

Nakakamiss lang ang may mga tao kang kakilala na makakasalubong sa daan, may tindahan na mauutangan, may mga kuyang kinukulit at pinagsasabihan pag nag fee-feeling nanay ako. Pero eto na nga ata ang inaasam ko na pagbabago sa buhay ko para sa taon na ito.

Sana lang maka-ipon na ko, para masimulan ko na ang iba sa aking mga pangarap. Tulad ng pag-biyahe sa ibang bansa, pag bili ng sariling kotse o bahay at lupa, pag aral ulit, pag karon ng sariling kasalda na pinangalanan na "Corpus" o "Bigol". Kahit building lang o kuwarto sa isang marangyang unibersidad, masaya na ko.

O sya mga kaibigan, ako'y kelangan umuwi na.. nakigamit lang ako sa PC ng aking mabutihing team leader (dahil wala na sya). Nawa'y makapag blog ako ng madalas.. na may pictures na.. ehehehe..

xoxo

Bigol

(Manood nga pala kayo ng Iryu: Team Medical Dragon.. maganda sya! nakakaadik ehehehhe)

2008 will be my year

2008-01-01T12:37:00.000+08:00

Things that happened in 2007

+ Fell in love
+ Went to Bohol, Cebu, La Union, Puerto Galera (thrice this year), and Boracay
+ Got myself thinking about my career
+ Gained a lot of pounds
+ Has not been into sports that much
+ Lessened my alcohol
+ Increased my smokes
+ Doubled my intake of coffee
+ I got a little boring
+ I bought new toys; iPod Touch, my bother's 2nd hand DS, a Holga, and my Nikon D40. (wow, lot of brasnd news unlike last year)
+ I did already say I'm at my "chubbiest" moment this year right?

I don't want to list any new years resolution since it's most likely not to come true. But I can assure you is, in 2008, there will be a lot of changes.

All in all, 2007 is one of my most memorable year =)

So I would like to thank a lot of people...

to my friends who always makes me laugh and makes me forget my worries, thanks for always being there, thanks for the lunch outs, dinners, coffee date, outings, text messages, exchange of emails, drinking sessions, yosi breaks, and especially for listening to my rantings and being patient with my out of place hirits.

to my baby who took care of me all through out the year, thanks for being the one special person in my life who makes me feel hot and sexy... oh, and also loved =p. I am looking forward to spending more years with you.

to my brothers whom I never really got along with when we were kids. Thanks for being there when I needed you guys. It's amazing how we matured and now can get along very well. Thank you for learning to accept that I'm not a baby anymore.

to my parents and granparents, you may not always be by my side, but I know that in our hearts, we'll always be together. Though there are tmes I feel weak, just thinking of you guys, makes me get back on my feet again because I don't want you to worry about me. And one day, I will make you really really proud of me.

So that's it dear readers, hopefully this year I'll get more hits. Haha! Thanks. See more of you in 2008!!

Updates!!

2007-12-16T22:10:00.000+08:00

I NEED TO UPDATE THIS BLOG MORE OFTEN!!!

+ Went to Bora last november 29 to december 3. FIRST TIME!! Though I like Bohol and Cebu better. I guess I'm more of a beach bum than a beach party go-er. But still, I know how to enjoy and I left my mark at Bora.. 15 shots babeeeeeh!!! 15 shots and still standing!!! Hahahaha!!

+ Watched Avenue Q yesterday and it was one of the best! I kept laughing so hard! It's really .. real! I like how they used the puppets and still made the story realistic. WATCH IT!!!!!!!!

+ 1 year na kami sa january.. weeeeeeh!!! *happy happy kilig kilig*

+ Wala ng globe unlitext :(

+ Will be moving out on January... exciting!!

+ Might be moving to wordpress (Thanks ate sienna)

+ I want a new laptop, or a desktop.. haaaay... so i can upload more pictures.

I guess that's all. Well not really, but that's all I remember for now.. like I said, I need to update this blog more often. Hehehe

2007-11-22T20:02:00.000+08:00

Things are quite going well for me.. well, sana hindi lang sila patikim. Anyways, I want to update my devart, but sadly, I haven't touched my camera for a month already. I find my blog borng because of the lack of pictures, and sensible posts. Boooooring!

I still need 7 stickers for the starbucks planner. 17 stickers in less than a month is not bad right? Ahahahhaha!

I still don't feel the chrismas spirit.. =( will somebody help me please.. =(

2007-11-19T22:31:00.001+08:00

I want ~~someone~~ him to be happy for me. =( as in genuinely happy, not no-choice-but-to-be-happy.

*edited

using my new toy to blog

2007-11-11T01:44:00.000+08:00

I love my new toy! Thanks momi shelles for convincing me. :)

Wala pang 24 hours, na jailbreak ko na :)... So far my favorite applications are lights off, black jack, summerboard, and calendar...

Though, I still have a hard time typing using the qwerty board.

But still it's worth the money I borrowed. Haha!

I'll try to blog more about it when I get my hands on a decent PC... my laptop is already dead.. huhu

Btw, I love my new toy so much that my boyfriend is jealous. Haha..

2007-11-07T22:59:00.001+08:00

new toy, happy ako..

tapos na i-configure, tinext ko si boyfriend kung san sya..

supposedly lalabas n ko..

hinarangan ako ni kuya dahil interested sya sa new toy ko..

syempre, mayabang ako, pinagmayabang ko naman..

so chikahan galore kami..

dumating text niya asking me what i am doing.. and sana nmana raw mag reply ako..

e d sabi ko nag chichikahan kami ng kuya ko..

palabas n ko ng pinto, natanggap ko text niya "uwi na lang ako"

e d binilisan ko.. wala pang half a kilometer yung layo niya, tinatawag ko sya.. as in sure ako na rinig niya.. at ayaw niyang lumingon, ayaw niya ko pansinin.

tinext ko ng "FINE!"

ngayon nag sosorry sya..

gago ba sya? eh ilang beses na niya ginawa yan ah! ilang beses ko na sinabing ayoko na ginagawa niya yun.. nakakabwiset! tas sasabihin niya na bumalik naman sya.. kung kelan nainis na ko??? leche! desisyon niya mag walk out bahala sya! ano ineexpect niya habulin ko sya ulit? eh naman! garrr!!!! di raw sya nagiisip.. lagi na lang! kelan kaya sya mag-iisip? TRY KO NGA MINSAN DI MAG-ISIP AT YUN ANG I-RASON KO! tanggapin niya kaya??? AND I RARELY SEE HIM HAPPY PAG MASAYA AKO!! ewan ko sa kanya.. he has a mental list of everything wrong or negative I say.. well I hope he takes note of this.. UNTI NA LANG MAPUPUNO NA TALAGA AKO!

so ano ginagawa ko ngayon para lumamig ulo ko? pag aralan si new toy.. haaay...

kainis. You know why? beacuse I know na bukas ok na naman kami. And I'm pretty sure this will happen again.

*all this post in 3 minutes

3 days late

2007-10-28T19:40:00.000+08:00

So... Happy birthday to me!

Well, belated..

Ayon, my birthday was sooooo plain. Except for special instances like the lunch at oysterboy and starbucks baristas mackoy and don bringing me banoffee pie and iced caramel macchiatto (yum!), also the mcdo dinner my tita and brother sponsored for me and the kids.

I'm already 24 and I'm still getting a hang of it. Parang ang rami pa ren kulang sa life ko. Pero since people say I'm still young, I guess kelangan ko maniwala.. hahahaha..

I was supposed to migrate or move or whatever to wordpress for my birthday, but I was pressed for time, because I only thought of it 2 days before the day itself.

Anyway, a few thanks to the people that made my birthday special:

Drei, Shelwin, Julie and Sherbs - Thanks for having time for the dinner despite our busy scheds. And for always being great friends (especially shelwin kasi lagi kitang sinusungitan).. You guys were my first friends at work, and I know that our friednship doesn't end there. I love you! (And I don't mind some of you guys having drama fits during my birthday. hahahah!)

PLG - You girls are the greatest! I mean, I really never thought that our friendship would reach this far. It started from sports to inuman to out of town trip. You guys do make me feel special. And I treasure each and everyone of you. Thanks for making joy's birthday and mine a week long celebration. Loveshoe all!!! *faints* *blags*

To all the people that greeted me.

1st person to greet me - my boyfriend
1st gradeschool friend - tj
1st HS friend - lian
1st college friend - darren
1st internationl greeter - keren
1st officemate - joy
1st "kid" - brendon
1st surprising text - GLOBE

To all the people that left a message and comment at friendster, thanks.

Wow, I guess all I need to do was blog about my day to realize it wasn't that plain afterall. Thanks. ^_^

My <3's Soundtrack

2007-10-21T16:05:00.000+08:00

There are a lot of soungs that reminds me of him. Especially songs that are his liking. Since he's more of a hip-hop guy and I, an all around person (naks!), I'm sharing this verses from few of my fave songs that reminds me of him. I try to avoid the songs he usually listens to.

I had tons of songs lined up to post, Temporary Madness - Jodie Brooke Wilson,
Bliss - Alice Peacock (feat John Mayer), Echo - Trapt, Come Down to Me - Saving Jane, Miss You Love - Silverchair, Everytime - Janet Jackson, etc.. But then I heard this song over the radio and it describe almost everything I feel when I'm with him.

Bubbly Colbie Caillat

Spoken:
Will you count me in?

Sung:
I've been awake for a while now
you've got me feelin like a child now
cause every time i see your bubbly face
i get the tinglies in a silly place

C: It starts in my toes
and I crinkle my nose
where ever it goes i always know
that you make me smile
please stay for a while now
just take your time
where ever you go

The rain is fallin on my window pane
but we are hidin in a safer place
under covers stayin dry and warm
you give me feelings that i adore

it starts in my toes
make me crinkle my nose
where ever it goes i always know
that you make me smile
please stay for a while now
just take your time
where ever you go

But what am i gonna say
when you make me feel this way
I just........mmmmmm

Starts in my toes
makes me crinkle my nose
where ever it goes i always know
that you make me smile
please stay for a while now
just take your time
where ever you go

da da da da da da da da bu dum da dum da dum da da dum ...mmmmmm

I've been asleep for a while now
You tucked me in just like a child now
Cause every time you hold me in your arms
I'm comfortable enough to feel your warmth

It starts in my soul
And I lose all control
When you kiss my nose
The feelin shows
Cause you make me smile
Baby just take your time now
Holdin me tight.
Where ever, where ever, where ever you go
Where ever, where ever, where ever you go...

Advance Happy Birthday baby!! =*

Blame is on me

2007-10-09T14:52:00.000+08:00

I've been up and down the stairs going to the 'downstairs' department. I mean, it's not really in my resume but since it was my program, I need to check what caused the mis-printing. The people from 'upstairs' department was also there.. it seemed so familiar.. oh yeah! It happened just 2 weeks ago, same setting, different problem. Explained what happened, went up, went down again to get the checklist from room#1 and took it to room#2 to verify the dataset and returned checklist to room#1.

It's been going for a month now. I admit the first one was my fault, but... I don't know. It's like I'm caught in the middle of something and I'm no good in pointing fingers on who or what went wrong.

I'd rather admit my faults and blame myself. So ok, It's my fault that I did not check my team mates program and testing since team mate based it on my analysis, it did not occur to me that the modif may affect other functions. It's my fault that I did not remind them that it's supposed to be the friday batch run that should have been printed. It's my fault that it was the dev data that was printed. It's my fault why it has been delayed because I haven't been really updating downstairs when upstairs told me to. It's my fault why tons of papers were wasted and now nature hates me.

And yeah, it seems weird that now I have to talk to the guy I raised my voice around 2 years ago while I was drunk because their team wouldn't join the newbies presentation. I can't even face him before! Oh the horror and embarassment. Good thing he was civil. I think he forgot.. I wish.

Hehe.

Desktop

2007-10-07T20:37:00.000+08:00

Momi shelles tagged me so finally I have something to post about. Yay!

---

A picture I shot in Malapascua, Cebu. Edited by Nigel. I love this shot because of the colors. The desktop has links to childish games and applications. Yay!

I'm tagging anna, drei, poli, deyey, and everyone!! Below are the instructions

---

Desktop Free View Instruction:

A. Upon receiving this tag, immediately perform a screen capture of your desktop. It is best that no icons be deleted before the screen capture so as to add to the element of fun. You can do a screen capture by:

[1] Going to your desktop and pressing the Print Scrn key (located on the right side of the F12 key).
[2] Open a graphics program (like Picture Manager, Paint, or Photoshop) and do a Paste (CTRL + V).
[3] If you wish, you can edit the image, before saving it.

B. Post the picture in your blog. You can also give a short explanation on the look of your desktop just below it if you want. You can explain why you preferred such look or why is it full of Icons, things like that.

C. Tag five of your friends and ask them to give you a Free View of their desktop as well.

D. Add your name to this list of Free Viewers with a link pointing directly to your Desktop Free View post to promote it to succeeding participants.

iRonnie
Thess
Rebecca
Knoizki
Beng
domlawrenceOSB
bluepanjeet
marievergara
Vanidosa
emmyrose1028
emmyrose
yennygirl
Little Peanut
aggie
missyosigirl
psych0sis

L-O-L-O-V-E

2007-09-27T19:18:00.000+08:00

The title has nothing to do with this post.

Argh! You know work is stressing you when you;re trying to sleep but all you can think about is the "how-to's", "loop holes", "error prevention", "error trapping", "testing", etc.. of your current project.

Work is kinda heavy right now because the deadline of the project I'm handling is nearing. I can't say I'm slacking off because I know I'm doing something. But I guess it's just not enough. You can't force your brain to think if it's already shut down right?

I need to go to the spa immediately! Or at least the salon. I haven't had my manicure and pedicure and footspa more than a month already! And my muscles are longing for a good, long massage.

Haay.. if only I had the time and I was rich enough to afford this "luho" on a regular basis.

Laban o Bawi

2007-09-19T19:15:00.000+08:00

Emotional breakdown eto..

Maraming cause..

Stress sa work
Stress sa buhay

Dagdag pa na lagi kami nag aaway at di magkaintindihan..
Minsan nararamdaman ko na talaga yun age gap namin..
Minsan di ko na ma-tolerate ang kanyang pagka immature..
Minsan feeling ko it won't work out..
Minsan hindi na ko masaya..

And yung minsan na yun nag sabay-sabay sa isang araw.. kamusta naman diba?

I broke up with him.. well I tried to break up with him.. over the text.. then over the phone.. Mehn, maiiyak-iyak ako sa office.. grabe.

Pumunta ako sa kanila to talk.. He wanted to be with me raw for the last time..

Ayon, parang laban o bawi lang.. pwede naman raw kalimutan na lahat and start over, kahit naman daw nagkakainisan kami, nagkakaayos ren naman raw... sabi ko ayaw ko umabot sa point na magkagalit kami.. sabi niya di naman raw aabot sa ganun.. ayaw raw niya.. di raw niya kaya.. Naisip ko ren, kaya ko ba? Pagkasama ko sya, nde ko ma-stand yung sobra niyang tahimik at pikon at pag-iisip.. pero pag wala naman sya at di ko alam kung asan, hinahanap hanap ko sya.. Inis na inis ako pag text sya ng text, pero pag di naman, nagtataka ako kung bakit at tingin ako ng tingin sa phone ko.. Pag ok naman mood niya, sobrang saya ko at sobrang kinikilig ako..

So natapos ang usapan with a kiss and a hug.

Tapos ok na..

Balik sa dati..

Stressed na lang sa work at life.. ahahhahaha

Dreaming of Pen

2007-09-09T22:26:00.000+08:00

This is so funny, a few days ago I dreamt of Pen Medina.. Yes, the guy who played hagorn, the guy who raped cogie domingo in deathrow, the guy who played eds dad in tabing ilog, the guy who we have seen in a lot of movies but I never saw him played lead roles (not much of a movie junkie), but one of the greatest actor I've watched.

Oh yes, about the dream.. I was watching him working on a movie (an action movie) at this old house, and yes he was the lead character. I got to interview him afterwards and his answers were amazing (too bad I can't remember them when I woke up). After the interview, he continued the shoot and I met up with my friends. I was like "I'm going to blog about this!". Then one of my friends asked what project was Pen working on. I answered "Prison Break Season 3". That was all I could remember when I woke up and natatawa ako, bakit? Kasi journalist ako.. hahahah! Ang weird lang.. Hehehe.. =p

+++

Still haven't worked on my external HD.. more than 30GB of MP3's, videos and pictures.. :( oh and my updated resume.. kainis!!! sana kaya pa i-restore.. hayayaay..

+++

Had an argument a while ago.. =( ang sad.. bakit ganun? kahit mahal niyo ang isa't isa, may mga bagay tala na di kayo magkasundo

Exhale

2007-09-06T18:24:00.000+08:00

I haven't posted as much as I used too. And I don't have any interesting stories to tell.

In fact, my life has been less dramatic since college, drinking sessions, getting over the ex, crying at night then drinking again, series of hearts being broken (or probably my ego) etc.. etc. Gawd I miss those days.

Ever since I've been working, I can do everything I want (as long it's legal and I have budget for it) that sometimes it gets boring.

It's either I do something illegal or I get rich and travel the world, now that would be something. But I don't want to start doing anything illegal and I'm not rich.

I've been here and there except where I really wanted to be, been doing this and that except what I really wanted to do. You know why? Because I have no idea of what I really want and where I want to go.

I have dreams, typical dreams of ladies my age.. but I have nothing specific for me. I have no passion for these goals that I'd rather sleep than work on achieving them.. and that just sucks.

I blame myself, well I have no one else to blame but me.

And even though I have blamed myself for months now, I still haven't seen any difference.

Sometimes I want to run away, thus the moving away part or working abroad. But I'm still not sure of the risks or if I have the guts to finally do what I've said a gazillion time. I have no savings to start with.

Oh yes, the savings. I don't know how to save. I have this notion to do what you wan tto do at that moment because maybe I'll be dead by tomorrow. So what's the point of saving up for a long term plan (thus not enjoying what you can enjoy now) when you're not even sure you're alive by then? But I'm slowly thinking about the future na ren (naks! tumatanda!), that's why I'm a bit confused on what to do. Or maybe it's because I just buy a lot of things (and eat too). Hey! I'm just doing things I haven't done when I was a kid! (defensive no?)

*sigh*

I've been reading my old post, and I wonder what happened to me? Haaay..

anyway, sabi ko sa niyo eh, I have no interesting stories to tell.

+++

An old post.. di ko na inedit para makita niyo how bad I am at writing:

PARK

"Hi." You said as you sat by my side. All I could do was stare. I did not expect to see you, especially today. I could tell that you just came from the gym. You stared back in a funny way. It was like you were trying to read my mind. "Gym?" I asked stupidly knowing that the answer was obvious. You just nodded your head. We sat beside each other not saying anything at all while watching the kids play in the park. You changed a lot since we were kids. You grew taller, much cuter and you even smell good when you’re sweaty.

After a few minutes of silence you looked at me and smiled. "What?" I asked while punching your arm in a playful manner. "Nothing, it’s just sometimes I wish we were kids again". And so do I. Things were less complicated back then when you were this stick-thin guy who likes to pretend that he was Batman, and no-boys/girls-allowed-clubs were the "IN" thing.

I saw your wristwatch. It’s the same wristwatch I gave you a few years ago. "Nice to see you’re still wearing that watch" I complimented. "This one? Why not? It was given by the best person in the world" you said while your smile melts my heart.

"I have to go. I still have a lot of things to do" I said as I stood up. You stood up being the gentleman that you are and said "Be there tomorrow ok? I need you to be there". I was able to smile and said "Of course, it’s your wedding; I wouldn’t miss it even if I get courtside passes to an NBA championship game". You dropped your bag and hugged me tight and whispered "Thanks. You’re the best friend any guy could ask for. I’ll name our kid after you". "Sabi mo yan ha, after 5 months dapat madadagdagan ang magaganda sa mundo" *(Just be sure that after 5 months, your kid would turn out as beautiful as me) I joked and you just smiled. "Sige na, aayusin ko pa yung dress ko para bukas" (Anyway, I still have to get my dress ready for tomorrow). As I turned around, I heard you whisper something. I whispered "I love you too". Too bad you cannot hear it together with my tears that you cannot see.

*I'm not good at translations.. hihi